"Friendship"

I was bullied in middle and high school. As a result, I became socially isolated and developed Schizoaffective disorder. I had no friends growing up, never went to parties, prom, nobody came to my high school graduation.

After graduating, I was weak and socially broken. I had extreme panic attacks, thought everybody was viewing me critically. I began living in fantasy-land, running from socialization.

I desperately needed to improve my social skills and end isolation.

In my early 20's, I met some "friends" but since I was hurt I thought I was above them and didn't "appreciate" their friendship. They sadistically withdrew their friendship, sending me further into isolation and mental illness.

They probably think they "taught me a lesson". Most people wouldn't have given their nonsense the time of day. If wasn't weak and socially broken from getting bullied in middle and high school, I wouldn't have been so desperate.

I'm very sad about losing the friendship. I often reminisce and want back what I had years ago, but I need to forget them! The future is the present, and what's to come. Don't look back.

I did learn not to be so judgemental, though.