Note:
I wrote the following two posts when I was delusional. The delusions have passed. But I'm going to share them because it gives insight into mental health challenges and illustrates how my mind works.
Post 01:
I'm coming to a realization, it's no delusion, I was being tortured by my sadistic mother. She was metaphorically trying to murder me while creating the facade.
Post 02:
Even if what I say about my mother is 100% true, she really was trying to kill me while creating the facade she wasn't, and it's not an emotional tsunami triggered by her narcissistic abuse... There's nothing I can do about it. They'll be no supreme court case. The best revenge for her torture is to make myself extremely successful. And that's not to say I wasn't getting worked up, catastrophized that she is Satan, the evilest of evil, which might not be entirely true. Maybe she got pleasure from my suffering. But she could kick me on the street. Make me homeless. She's taking care of me, handling my adult responsibilities, and providing me with a place to live. Yes, I want more. I want financial independence, true friends, a girlfriend, and a life... But my chains are internal, not maternal. Many people with severe mental health challenges would consider me to be lucky because they have it much worse.
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