July 16, 2022:
Post 01:
All I'm going to wear when I'm around my dad is Cena Jorts and the Syd Barrett white tank top. I'll make him think I don't own better clothes. Lol.
Post 02:
I touched the spray cleaner that's used to clean the treadmills. On the cleaner, there was some kind of slime. I'm not sure what it was. But it got on my hand. The likelihood some psychopath is trying to murder me is slim. It's most likely sweat, or the spray cleaner itself.
July 18, 2022:
Post 01:
When I'm single and have nobody coming over my apartment, I can go months without washing my bedsheets.
Post 02:
I desperately need friends and socialization with peers. Ideally, I'd like to meet a friend who's a woman.
If anybody lives near me, wants to be friends, socialize, and have fun together feel free to reach out.
I'm interested in genuine friendship. No bullies.
Post 03:
I'm on medication for acid reflux, but it's still bothering me. Going to gastrologist soon. Not sure why this won't go away. It sucks.
I think it's the coffee. I thought the Nitro Cold Brew was good for acid reflux?
I'm addicted to caffeine, feel like a zombie when I don't have it.
Post 04:
Sometimes you don't want to admit it, especially when you enjoy your coffee in the morning, but that is the problem that is causing the acid reflux. When I tried to give up coffee a few weeks ago, I was like a zombie and was so irritable due to the withdrawal. My parents noticed.
Post 05:
Before I have my coffee, I'm cranky, groggy. Then I have it, it's like Popeye and spinach. I'm chipper, energetic, and happy. It's because I'm addicted to the caffeine. So when I try to withdraw from it, I become very fatigued and irritable. But I'm getting bad acid reflux.
Post 06:
When I was leaving the gym it was windy and dirt and gravel blew into my eye. I'm afraid somebody walked on it with dirty shoes prior and I'm getting contamination fears. But don't worry. This is no risk. Occasionally wind will blow dirt into your eyes.
Post 07:
I'm putting on a comedy clinic, my artwork and social media posts are gold. Are my parents really that blind to my worth? Do they not want to accept my worth? As an artist, I'm like the best in the world and everybody tells me what a loser I am. It's so frustrating.
Post 08:
They say I need an assisted living group home. When the people I'm dependent on, my parents, go away it'll be a rude awakening for me. Look at my social media posts. I should be a millionaire movie star right this second. Actually, I should have been years ago.
Post 09:
I'm tired of being treated like a burden. I'm tired of being dependent and feeling worthless. Somebody show me some love and tell me how special I am. Not that I'm this loser that could potentially be homeless, or in assisted living group home. Tell me how talented I am right now.
Post 10:
I lost an enormous amount of time, solitary, in a fantasyland. Who is to blame? The childhood bullies? My parents? Who is the sadistic persecutor who traumatized me? Remember, my parents weren't trying to give me the worst life imaginable. But the bullies were trying to hurt me.
Post 11:
Yes, my parents were neglectful. There needed to be an intervention when I was 18 years old. But they're providing me with a place to live, food, water, and shelter. If my parents really didn't love me, if they wanted to torture me... I'm 34 years old, they'd make me homeless.
Post 12:
The two biggest problems I have with my parents are:
When I was self-sabotaging and could've dropped dead (running years), they allowed it to go on for over five years.
Also, forcing me to take the mega regimen of psychiatric medication for 10 years or so. Will I get cancer now?
Post 13:
My mom would complain about her medication and call it "mind-numbing." How do you think I felt? I was taking significantly more than her and if it killed me I feel like she wouldn't have even cared that much. It'd be a relief like finally the burden is gone.
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