Some Posts (11 19 2021)

Post 01:

When I was in the bathroom at the gym, after washing my hands then I used the hand dryer. It's an intense dryer and water blew into my eye. Is this a contamination risk? Even if it was somebody else's fluids - you can't get HIV this way. Right?

Post 02:

The hand dryer at the gym that blew water into my eye was a heavy blow one. Lots of places have them. It's probably water from my hands, but the dryer was hanging over a wet counter. Could've been somebody else's body fluids that blew in my eye. There I go again. I'm fine. Relax!

Post 03:

I think my delusions are true. My parents really are criminals.

My dad mentioned "fire" today, I'm afraid he's going to destroy my artwork so I can't make money from them.

Or do my parents love me?

Post 04:

I need to remind myself that I'm getting delusional about my parents. They did not get sadistic pleasure from torturing me, ruining my life, while creating the facade they're loving parents for the public.

Now I'm filled with HATE from getting abused and I look like a criminal.

Post 05:

I've come down on my psychiatric medications, not off of them entirely YET. Working towards that. Coming down on meds has given me more energy, I feel unstoppable. For example, I completed an hour at the gym with EASE!

Post 06:

Cabergoline is for the adverse side effects. Invega raises prolactin significantly. So it was prescribed to lower prolactin which helps with sexual function. I got a letter of medical necessity to take double the recommended max dose. I've been taking it for about ten years.

I googled: "what is the long-term damage for taking cabergoline?" It's not good. And this is for the recommended max dose - 1 mg weekly. I've been taking double the recommended max dose, 2mg weekly for about ten years. I trusted my doctor, now I'm afraid this is going to kill me.

Post 07:

There's no conspiracy. My parents aren't torturers. My psychopharmacologist wasn't aware but medicated anyway. The mega regimen of meds was prescribed to help me, keep me healthy, not to kill me. Remember my doctor is on my side. He's not a criminal, neither are my parents.