Post 01:
I'm doing good physically, but my mental health has been poor. I'm afraid if this solitude goes on for days, weeks, months, years, I'm going to have another psychotic break. It's my responsibility to leave the house and meet people. Isolation is MY FAULT.
Post 02:
Even when I get out of the house and try socializing, I feel different from everybody else, like I'm this FREAK, unreal, a buffoon cartoon character with no social skills, that everybody looks at critically, so I just want to hide from the world at home.
Post 03:
At 34-years-old, my mom is enabling me to be a sheltered man-child, who lives in a fantasyland, and hides from the world. But I'll be up schitt's creek without a paddle when my mom goes away.
Post 04:
I was having a lot of fun with my BFF. She was helping me develop my social skills, confidence, and make a recovery... Now we broke up and won't see each other as much. It's too bad. Ugh!
I need to do any socialization. I can't go into my "inner world" because it'll get me sick.
Post 05:
After all the trauma I lived through, I'm afraid I won't be able to relate to anyone anymore. But I'll be surprised. People are not that different. Even people who have suffered tremendously can fall in love. The right person can heal their damaged mind. Just stop isolating.
Post 06:
I'll look into acting and theater, like I did with comedy.
At first I was nervous when I started comedy, but honestly, it couldn't have gone any better. I was successful and had fun. Hopefully the same happens if I try acting and theater.
Post 07:
There used to be a red, fresh apple that sat on my countertop. I watched it turn black, rot, and shrivel up.
That's what my brain is like. Many years ago, I had a fresh, healthy, and happy brain. But solitude, trauma, and wasted time is causing my brain to rot like this apple.
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