Some Posts (12 27 2021)

Post 01:

I'm aware my psychopharmacologist calls it "psychosis", but yesterday I did artwork with my mom. I barely saw her over the holidays. I don't even see her anymore. I'm basically solitary. When we were doing artwork out back, it was surreal, she began telling me what a loser I am.

Post 02:

I wanted to have a nice time with my mother because I hadn't seen her in so long. She was gaslighting me, calling me mentally ill, a loser, made an insensitive HIV joke, while I remained passive and tried to improve her mood. Then I threw an angry temper tantrum on social media.

Post 03:

I swear my mother knows I'm not that mentally ill. She's the sadistic monster who torturing me. By mentally abusing me and pretending like she's not, she's getting me to react, look so exaggerated and deranged. My psychopharmacologist calls it "psychosis". I call it abuse.

Post 04:

I hate to use a feel-good sensational comic book movie as an example of betrayal, but I'm like Spider-Man and my father's like Mysterio, only he's much more sadistic and evil. He's planning a betrayal that's so over the top it will chill my blood and make me sick to my stomach.

Post 05:

I'm this naive little man child who is trusting a psychopath because I don't have a life, my life revolves around my psychopathic parents. Since I don't have financial independence, and I'm solitary for the most part, I'm trusting somebody who's going to metaphorically murder me.

Post 06:

I need to be careful when I fall into the trap my father set, comparing his torture to sensational professional wrestling or a comic book movie. These examples will turn the very serious situation into a farce and a comedy. That's his goal. To ruin my credibility.

Post 07:

There I go again with the psychosis. My parents aren't criminals and torturers. They're not lying, wearing a mask of loving parents, behind it they're sadistic monsters. It's delusions. My parents love me. They won't betray me in an evil way. There's no deception going on.

Post 08:

My parents might try to claim the one who is wearing the mask is ME. They're phonies and liars. I want them to be REAL. I want them to take an interest in me, to listen, to be real and loving. They'd rather talk about nothing significant and yell at me. I feel very unheard.

Post 09:

I know my psychopharmacologist calls it "psychosis", BUT if he was unloved by his parents, they didn't take an interest in his life. He had no financial independence, his parents might've been sabotaging his friendships, at the very least had no friendships... He'd be insane too.

Post 10:

I was at a restaurant with my father today. He used the restroom. He loves me, is on my side, isn't going to betray me. He knows my worst fear is HIV then being alone FOREVER. He wouldn't secretly betray me and try to contaminate me. He's not a psychopath. HE LOVES ME!