intentional murder

Post 01:

Am I crazy? Or is it obvious my mother was trying to intentionally murder me with the rabies vaccine? She's a monster behind a mask - a sadistic deceiver. She joked how there's like one case of rabies in the U.S.A. and how forcing the family to do it was insane. Or "delusional"?

Post 02:

My mother knew exactly what she was doing. She was sadistically torturing me, trying to murder me, while creating the facade she wasn't. She controlled my narrative and got all these "expert" doctors to validate her lies. That doesn't change the fact - it was intentional murder.

Post 03:

Calm down. Don't get so overtaken with emotion that I lose sight of reality. Yes, I'm upset about the rabies vaccine. Yes, I'm afraid it's going to kill me and I'm dying. But if my mother didn't think it was necessary she wouldn't have gotten it for herself too.

Post 04:

My mother is insane and could have killed me with her insanity, but that doesn't mean she didn't think she was helping me. Maybe in her mind the rabies vaccine was protecting me? But then why does she make jokes about how crazy it is we got it? Is this a facade and intentional?

Post 05:

She did get the whole family - including herself - vaccinated for rabies. Unless she's a criminal mastermind committed to her facade and lies, then why would she get it for herself? Maybe it's like Batman and she's a two-faced statistic deceiver creating this elaborate lie?

Post 06:

I'm starting to get paranoid she infected me with rabies in secret then when I don't complete the vaccine, become rabid, she'll say: "I told him so." Is she a criminal mastermind like Gus Fring from Breaking Bad? Or am I getting overtaken with emotion. Relax. It's not murder.

Post 07:

In hindsight, there was no reason to get the vaccine. But last Thursday it was necessary since we didn't know the status of the bat... But then why does my mom make jokes about how few cases of rabies there is in the U.S.A. and laugh about how crazy getting vaccinated was?

Post 08:

I tried apologizing to my mother. I think if she showed even the slightest bit of empathy and remorse it would make this better, but she's literally shows me NONE. She doesn't care if I die. She yells at me. Tells me how I'm irrational. She abuses and neglects me emotionally.

Post 09:

Even if my mother wasn't trying to murder me by having me get the rabies vaccine, her jokes about how insane it is hurt because I didn't want to get it in the first place. She forced me to get the rabies vaccine in the ER. Then yells at me when I get upset how she forced me to.