Post 01:
I hope there's a logical explanation for EVERYTHING. If mistakes were made but I'm loved, I'll be forgiving. You need to genuinely have had good intentions the whole time. This doesn't just apply to one person. It could even apply to myself and how my mental illness affected them
Post 02:
Even if I'm dying, with mental gymnastics I could blame it on you, but in reality you had good intentions... I still want to forgive everyone. ASSUMING they weren't bullying me. I don't think they were. They were angels who wanted to give me the surprise of my life. I was sick.
Post 03:
I was told to read the room. Even in the partial program of people just released from the psychiatric hospital, I am the elephant in the room. It's not being a moron like Beavis and Butt-Head. It's I have schizoaffective disorder and people are disturbed by me.
Post 04:
People from my past are trying to retcon that they thought I was Beavis and Butt-Head, always knew it was mental illness, and believed in me. It's not true. It's revisionist history.
Post 05:
I was getting an INTENSE PANIC ATTACK about Kelly. Is it POSSIBLE she is deceiving me? Sure. By try not to get so worked up with emotions and fear. Don't lose touch with all the love she's given me. Don't say "the delusions have passed." Instead say "my emotions have calmed down"
Post 06:
People tell me to stop creating self-pity artwork and create artwork that's more positive. Didn't Roger Waters from Pink Floyd create an entire career about how horrible his life is? I'm not saying negativity is great, but a lot of people relate to it.
Post 07:
Does Pink Floyd have one happy song? Maybe some of the early stuff, but for the most part it's all negativity. That's the reason they became successful with Dark Side of the Moon. The upgraded lyrics. The prior albums were good musically. The lyrics are the reason for success.
Post 08:
I'm getting afraid Kelly deceived me and my mother KNEW and was INTENTIONALLY trying to give me brain cancer / HIV and everyone will sympathize with her because although she's a deceiving psychopath, she's cuter. Remember this is an emotional daydream panic attack.
Post 09:
They say isolation is as deadly as smoking. The reason I wasted so much time in solitude is because I was bullied in middle and high school. I was vulnerable. Had no self-esteem. Did my parents need to intervene? Yes. But they weren't trying to intentionally hurt me.
Post 10:
I wasn't like Elizabeth Smart who was being sadistically tortured by sexual sadists. It was my choice to in solitude. It's not my mother's fault. Take accountability. Isolation is damaging and can cause cancer, but I wasn't being held at gunpoint. I had freedom to do things.
Post 11:
If the FBI or psychiatrists thought there was any truth to what I was saying they'd rescue me IMMEDIATELY, not let me get SADISTICALLY TORTURED. The problem is my Schizoaffective disorder. It's bad. I want to blame others. But it's MY FAULT. My chains are internal, not maternal.
Post 12:
It feels like my BRAIN IS ON FIRE. I'm getting EXCRUCIATING HEADACHES. It's from solitude, being unloved, and involuntarily celibate. I DESPERATELY need someone nurturing, a mother figure, to HELP. Hopefully, I do not have life-threatening brain cancer. I want to have some fun.
Post 13:
Dr. Garrett and Dr. Coplan knew. They always knew. They were the best in the business at psychiatry. They weren't incompetent fools. They didn't say it to my face. But they were aware.
Post 14:
Assuming what I'm saying is true and my parents are sadistic deceiving torturers. That's like the ultimate arrogance thinking they could bring metaphoric Elizabeth Smart to the best in the business at psychiatry and assuming they'll get away with it. It's definitely a delusion.
Post 15:
Was I like Link, Kelly is like Princess Zelda in secret, and this is like the video game The legend of Zelda? She's my fairy godmother who is planning to rescue me and we'll make a power couple like Bill and Hillary Clinton? Or she a North Korean torturing Otto Warmbier?
Post 16:
Did Kelly actually have HIV and she wanted to sadistically infect me knowing I was innocent and practically a virgin, which my parents knew about? Or were her intentions truly to help me recover from severe mental illness? Try to remember all the warm and happy memories.
Post 17:
My parents and Kelly were doing one big humiliation ritual while secretly trying to murder me and infect me with HIV. They weren't trying to hide it. In fact, they planned to expose it when the time was right. It has always been intentional sadistic torture and gaslighting.
No comments:
Post a Comment