Dr. Garrett E-Mails, June 2020, WWE WrestleMania (Defeating My Friend)

WWE WrestleMania (Defeating My Friend)

My Email:

Tue, Jun 2, 2020, 2:31 PM

Because I was severely bullied, I had no friends in my early 20's. I hated my life so much. I was full of ANGER and FRUSTRATION. I thought no one understood.

Unfortunately, the people who hurt me were long gone. But there was a friend who tried to help me through text.

Though, we shared some laughs.  

I'm like a professional wrestler who used a SADISTIC submission maneuver, which is called GUILT. Instead of defeating people through pinfall, I TRIED TO MAKE THEM TAP OUT with GUILT, by being cruel to them in my texts.

Since I couldn't defeat the bullies, I tried to defeat my friend. For some reason, this friend just listened and tried to help.

And one day, they stopped communicating. It devastated me. It was a real loss.

I'm like an underdog, fighting for the Heavyweight championship at WrestleMania (the WWE's Super Bowl). I have the biggest, badest, star in the middle of the ring, in my GUILT submission hold. I have the match won. They're about to tap. Maybe I need to release the hold, realize they're my friend, and move on. Let them be.

I became so obsessed with vengeance, that I began hurting people who cared for me.

Rather than self-serving myself, maybe I can help others. When I get my life together, I can give speeches at middle and high schools. Doing comedy with an anti-bullying message.

I must empower and help others.

Dr. Garrett Reply:

Tue, Jun 2, 2020, 4:20 PM

Andrew

Some thoughts about this email ....

Are you trying to use your SADISTIC GUILT hold on your father, mother, and step-father, hoping they will 'tap out'?   How do you imagine this ends when they 'tap out'?  In wrestling when the loser taps out, the winner raises his fists in victory and the crowd applauds.  If your father, mother, and step-father 'tap out' and say something like, "Andrew, you have been right all along.  All three of us have abused you sexually."  what happens next?  Who is there to applaud?   Do the three of them set up a life-time pension plan for you out of their guilt so that you don't need to be rescued by Hollywood anymore, but the guilt reparations will take care of you the rest of your life?  How is it going to work?

Or, did our conversation today make you a bit anxious, all this talk about starting small, getting a 5 minute comedic video about mental illness done, then build from there?  That sounds challenging, more challenging than getting your parents to provide for you.

Dr G

My Email:

Tue, Jun 2, 2020, 4:31 PM

The person I was trying to make tap out was my friend, Ed, through my guilt text messages.

Basically, I was hurt, and couldn't get vengeance on the bullies. So while we had many pleasant and funny conversations. I could also be a bully to my friends. I was trying to make them tap out by making them feel guilty. I guess you hurt those who care. Break the cycle, help people, and become a success.

In the end, the friendship ended which devastated me. It was a huge loss.

I messaged some people at the FH about starting a mental health-related video project, I took some action.